This week has been, in a word, humbling.
I had to start looking for a job and admit I don't know what I'm doing.
I had to say goodbye to my elementary school students, the teachers at the school and say "yeah, probably not coming back next year... not sure though!" I hate saying goodbyes, especially saying fresh goodbyes every year.
I went back to the youth group I had left so drastically a few months ago and said... yeah, so I... just missed you guys.
And celebrated a birthday I should've celebrated in February...
I also realized: I don't love myself and I definitely don't love my circumstances. And I got this video in my inbox, where the definition of humility is "total acceptance of our circumstances."
Some of my favorite parts from the following video:
- "...que nos demos cuenta de cual es el verdadero y unico camino: el verdadero trabajo de humildade" (we realize what the true and only way is: the true work of humility)
- "entonces no hay lugar ya al deseo de sobresalir y de controlar a los demas" (then there is no place for the desire to stand out and control others)
- "asi mismo es humilde: cuando se es consciente de que todo lo que nos acontece es con el fin determinado de aprender por lo tanto la aceptacion total de nuestras circunstancias" (in this way we are humble: in the awareness that everything that happens to us is with the goal to teach us total acceptance of our circumstances)
"In ancient times it was understood that there was a transcendent moral order outside the self, built in to the fabric of the universe. If you violated that metaphysical order there were consequences just as sever as if you violated a physical reality by placing your hand in fire. The path of wisdom was to learn to live in conformity with this unyielding reality. That wisdom rested largely in developing qualities of character, such as humility, compassion, courage, descretion and loyalty.
Modernity reversed this. Ultimate reality was seen not so much as a supernatural order but as the natural world, and that was malleable. Instead of trying to shape our desires to fit reality, we now seek to control and shape reality to fit our desires. The ancients looked at an anxious person and prescribed spiritual character change. Modernity talks instead about stress-management techniques." (The Reason for God by Timothy Keller, p.71)